My Amazon review of You Don’t Have to Say You Love Me: A Memoir (Rating 4): An Uneasy Relationship Confronted by an Uneasy Author – I was halfway through Alexie’s memoir when I heard the NPR report about his repeated sexual aggression. It was several days before I could go back to reading the book, incorporating that knowledge. I already knew of Alexie’s anger at the mistreatment of Indians. In his memoir, I learned about his being personally abused too. Neither justifies his abuse toward women. However, I bought and read the book for his insights into his troubled relationship with his mother. My late mother was also a difficult person, so this was an area where I found it easier to empathize with him. Alexie speaks eloquently of his ambivalence toward her, feelings that will never be resolved. However, honest memoirs like his can help fellow travelers on an endless journey toward greater understanding, levels of forgiveness, and letting go while still holding on.
